today i did what the living do shook out my hair in the sun with the red crushof an apple in my mouth and thought of how someone once told me all answers are found in a silent room but now i realize that silent room is still filled with the sound of my breathing which means the answer is a room with a heartbeat which means the answer is a room with you in it still breathing
sara how long ago did we watch that movie about men on a boat chasing a swordfish into the hot blue night where everything happened in the sea or against it the women carrying baskets as the men pulled through the violent waves to grab hold of that thing swimming for its life. when they finally reeled it in giantsilverheaving someone shot into the air signaling for the women to start chopping the herbs maybe this is what life is anyways just a series of smoke signals disappearing after we’ve tried desperately to catch whatever we can in order to save ourselves and our bodies which are always changing into new costumes in the long colorful parade towards the end
sara i want to tell you i was always rooting for the swordfish if i had been on that boat i would have let it go free tossed my gun and my line into the rush of water and come home sara now i know the answer was never inside the room was never a room at all is actually opening the door and walking down to the sea to dip your feet in even though that means letting the universe know exactly where you are so it can hunt you down with a hook or a car or a poison apple and sara the room might not have been the answer but thank you for leaving the door open when you left so i could hear the watery call of my name sara thank you for reminding me it’s always better to be at the edge than inside
Raisa Imogen was born in Portland, OR, grew up in Chicago, and currently lives in Bologna, Italy. Her work can be found at Word Riot, The Kenyon Review, The Manifest Station, and www.raisaimogen.net.